Moving.

As it comes closer to that day, I wake up every morning for work and can't help but look around our home. Yep, home. Where I basically grew up. And although I lived in a dormitory for four years during college, a dormitory, close to the university, wherein your parents pay for the rent...is miles away from being on your own, in the city, close to your workplace. In a couple of days, I'll be out. And as much as I've anticipated and longed to move out, I can't help but step a little bit harder as I walk on out tiled floor, inhale the familiar scent of our home, and take mental pictures of a place where I will leave behind my family, my old life, and my dependence. (just typing that word gave me some chills)

I am moving out and these are my thoughts. Because as I write this, my hands are getting sweatier and colder. Hell yeah. Who would have thought I'll actually be a little bit anxious. Maybe even scared. Or maybe, this is just that fear before you jump. You're scared but you jump in, anyways.

My parents and I have been arguing about this for almost half a year already, I want to move out and live in the city. Although where we live is just a mere an hour and a half (two hours at most) away from the city, I still feel the need to live in the city. This can't be helped. I am a city owl. The places that I need to go now are increasing, as well as the people that I need to spend time with. And our small little city up there in the hills is too far from the life I am living.

I guess it's the thought that I'll be away from my mom again. My sister, I guess we're pretty much used to live away from each other, it wasn't intended, it just happened. I guess, it's the familiar comfort of home, of your pets that you can hug when you feel low, your bed that has been there for you, always.

But there will always be a point wherein we will have to leave all these comforts and venture on our own. Because by living outside of our comfort zone, that is how we move forward with our lives. We will finally make decisions for ourselves, we will make mistakes, we will disappoint others and ourselves, we're gonna be tired and broke, we will long for home. But we must endure all these. 

The room might be small and dark, the view may not be great. However, remember that we are still in the first few steps in the ladder of our own lives. There'll be no more dad that would lift us up into his shoulder and let us see the world. There'll be no more mom who would cook warm soup for us when we're sick. This time, we're on our own, alone. And we need to survive.

This is just one of the first few steps.